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Reginald Thumbington III

Reginald Thumbington III
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Reginald Thumbington III was born sometime in the early 2000’s, but, because he has no brain, he cannot remember the precise time and date. He previously ruled over the Finger Lakes as a totalitarian dictator in an alternate dimension known as Handyland. A self-proclaimed Pastafarian messiah, Mr. Thumbington can often be seen attempting to convert unsuspecting victims to his eternal worship on Quora. In addition, he has many hand-tastic hobbies such as arm-wrestling, hoarding bracelets and bowties (as he is a Hand of Culture), and being better than everyone else. After being exiled from his Porcelain Throne on Handyland due to a democratic uprising following his ambiguous ban of rubber duckies, Reginald Thumbington III is excited to start his new career as a journalist at the only place that would hire him. He is hopelessly and permanently attached at the right elbow to Lizzie Van Buren (‘22) and loves to torture her by leaving smudges on her doodles on purpose.

The Board Game Club Plays a Catastrophic Game of Jumanji

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Despite being deathly allergic, I STILL have an intense craving for peanuts!

Advanced-Level Math and Science Students Admit They Don’t Understand Basic Calculations

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This is a very complex problem! Only a genius could know what four times five is in their head.

Secrets Behind Blue Hall Renovation Revealed

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"I can't believe it!" exclaimed one junior while gazing longingly at the wall that separates the functioning part of the Blue Hall from the mystical land of the construction zone.

Reginald Thumbington III Solves Your Biggest Problems

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Good ol' Reggie T: ex-totalitarian dictator, devout Pastafarian, journalist extraordinaire—and now a self-help guru—here to solve your most pressing issues. He has recently done some very thorough research into the minds of high schoolers...

Poetry Month: Yam Edition

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"Yam" is the thing with tubers

Yampage’s Guide to Pets

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A hippo is absolutely a better investment in the long term than a good education anyway.

My Holiday Traditions: Reginald Thumbington III

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Despite several complaint letters from the JD community, Yampage's winter break countdown will not be stopping!

Students and Teachers Share Their Christmas Gift Requests for 2020

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On December 1, Santa (who, according to many sources, looked a little too suspiciously like Mr. Gasparini in a faux beard) was spotted infiltrating classes to get the inside scoop on what our students and teachers most desire. The results may surprise you.

Worldwide Clay Shortage Brings Local Ceramics Teacher to Tears

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“I KNEW I should have just stuck with Photography!” another stated after having a panic attack inside the Firing Room while watching his beloved masterpiece break into two.