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Digby Thanoscar

Digby Thanoscar is a proud New Yamsterdam native with a background in botany and underwater welding. When not writing for Yampage, Thanoscar enjoys watching "Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives," and writing long Twitter threads on why it’s an objectively better show than "Chopped." On the rare occasion "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives" isn’t on, Thanoscar can be found playing Papa’s Freezeria. Thanoscar hopes to visit Flavortown with David Scibilia (‘22).

Farewell, Digby Thanoscar

Ever since I was a child, I had heard rumors about a place so great that every man or woman must visit before they die, a place where roads were paved in gold.

Should You Take AP Euro?

Have you ever been conflicted on which elective to take? Fear not, for below is a BuzzFeed quiz on whether or not you should take AP European History!

Inflation Hits J-DHS—Students Now Need Two Hall Passes

I remember when I was a student, I only needed half of a hall pass to get from here to F-M.

Excess COVID Relief Funds to be Used for Italian Tiles in All Bathrooms

This level of cultural awareness is what truly separates J-D.

J-DHS Successfully Flattens the Curve

They never said what axis it had to be flat against, just that the curve had to be flat.

Crocs and Socks Now Against School Dress Code

First you take our Wednesdays away, then you take away our natural, God-given right to wear socks with whatever footwear we want?

Teddy Todorov Wins Senior Slate Election, Named Supreme Leader

“That was their fatal mistake,” senior Teddy Todorov said. In a shocking turn of events, Todorov gained enough write-in votes to win the majority among students. Either Ms. Oppedisano and Mr. Cotett didn’t do a good enough job in Government classes to explain the importance of voting, or Todorov found a way to hack the Google Form. Either way, Todorov went from your average high school student to President, Vice President, Secretary, Treasurer, and Director of Communications of the senior class.

Math Curriculum Excludes Quadratics in Order to “Flatten the Curve”

“I was told not to teach the quadratic formula this year even though it is nearly essential to my class,” Mrs. Sullivan said in an interview. “How can I prepare my students for the SAT or any math above geometry without x equals negative b plus or minus the square root of b-squared minus 4ac all over 2a?” 

Student’s Score Cancelled for Standing During the SAT

JUNE 5, J-DHS -- Students piled into the building early Saturday morning for the final administration of the SAT before the end of the school year. All was well until a student taking the...