Actual Twins Deem Twin Day Cultural Appropriation

Homecoming spirit week is supposed to be a joyful time. However, last Tuesday’s Twin Day has caused outrage among J-DHS’s twin population.

“Dressing like a twin is cultural appropriation,” senior twin Malak Aljerari said. “It’s not okay for non-twins to dress up like twins because they think it’s ‘cute.’”

Other twins agree with Aljerari.

“By organizing a Twin Day, student government is invalidating my lived experience,” sophomore Anna Hasegawa ranted. “It stirred up painful memories of being dressed up like my twin sister when I was little.”

“It’s so outdated. I mean, it’s 2022, not 1950. Times change. Things that were considered okay when student government was growing up aren’t okay now,” sophomore Clara Hasegawa told YamPage. “I don’t think there are even any twins on student government.”

The J-D Twin Student Union has been very vocal about issues affecting twins in the past. Last year, they created a series of PSAs about twin slurs such as “tw*nning” and “tw*nsies.” Following Twin Day, the group released a statement calling the spirit day “outdated” and “highly offensive.”

The TSU’s movement is even supported by non-twins.

“My best friend in third grade was a twin, so I get it,” ally Connie Zhang stated. “It’s just so messed up that student government would do this.” Our interview was cut short because Zhang needed to make an Instagram post about how terrible the Twin Day was.

However, not all students feel this way.

“The twins need to stop being so fragile,” triplet Nicki Meskos complained. “Twins have it so easy these days, if you ask me.”

The TSU has created a petition to get the student government to apologize for Twin Day and to ban all future Twin Days. So far it has received an even number of signatures.

In response to this petition, student government has released the following statement claiming that “several twins were consulted before we organized the spirit day.” After some investigation, YamPage discovered that the aforementioned twins were actually one triplet and a set of siblings who were one year apart in age.

The TSU has announced plans to boycott all future spirit weeks.

In other news, Student Government is also in hot water with Geography Club, who believe that Wild West Day infringes upon their monopoly on cardinal directions.

Aveline Chocolat
Aveline Chocolat aka Jeanette Natalia Caramel aka Myrna Smush is a renowned journalist and billionaire. Ms. Chocolat/Caramel/Smush is a two time winner of the Miss Portugal beauty pageant. She won in 1986 and 2014. She has been called the fifth Beatle by people who are not familiar with the Beatles or numbers. She earned a degree in Mongoose Farming from Middle Tennessee State University. She claims she can see the future, but she refuses to give any specifics about her abilities. Despite her deathly yam allergy, she says she is very happy to be writing at YamPage…she also would like to ask “What is YamPage?” She’d call Anka Chiorini (’23) a good friend.