It\u2019s official! The Holiday Season is upon us. Many claim that the winter holidays are a special time to delight in the company of our dearest friends and family, but don\u2019t be fooled! This season is about one thing and one thing only: THE GIFTS, of course! J-D was really in for a treat this week when Santa Claus himself chose to visit the school in order to get information about the most coveted wishlist items of 2020. On December 1, Santa (who, according to many sources, looked a little too suspiciously like Mr. Gasparini in a faux beard) was spotted infiltrating classes to get the inside scoop on what our students and teachers most desire. The results may surprise you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Santa\u2019s first stop was room G01, the health room. Mrs. Moore, wearing a red and green argyle sweater with the words \u201cKindness is always in season,\u201d was the first to see him. After praising her for her wonderful holiday cheer, Santa asked for her wish, to which Moore eagerly replied \u201cToe Tunes!\u201d When further inquired on this peculiar request, she explained that Toe Tunes were a pair of cozy slippers that harbored a surprise–they had built in speakers! \u201cHow useful!\u201d she exclaimed. \u201cI\u2019d never have to use headphones again. I could play my jams right through my shoes! I could even wear them to school on Pajama Day.\u201d Visions of playing \u201cHappy\u201d by Pharrell Williams at full volume at 3 AM on a school night danced through the teacher\u2019s head. Her students, however, had zany ideas of their own. Anka Chiorini (\u201823) requested something equally practical from Mr. Claus. \u201cThis year, while pondering asking for things like gaming consoles, makeup products, and phone accessories like I usually see on Christmas and Chanukah lists, I had a revelation. None of that stuff will help me in the future! Which is why I asked Santa for a flyswatter. Think of the uses! I can use it as a badminton racket, a bubble wand, and, most importantly, when someone\u2019s bugging me, I can just swat them with that thing, and they\u2019ll leave me alone forever!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Next, Santa stopped by the library where Lizzie and Sarah Van Buren (\u201822) were studying up on their North Pole history. Both sisters were eager to inform Mr. Claus of their own unique requests. Sarah told Santa that her life\u2019s dream would finally be able to be fulfilled in the New Year: \u201cI\u2019ve always wanted to grow a doughnut tree! And what better way to do that then with some doughnut seeds? For years, my parents told me that I was too young to be able to care for and maintain my own garden, but now that I\u2019m sixteen, I feel I\u2019m finally ready for this tremendous responsibility.\u201d Although the seeds in her screenshotted image resembled Cheerios, Sarah told that they were obviously two different substances because she \u201cjust knew that Doughnut Seeds were the real deal.\u201d Lizzie had her own heart\u2019s desire. \u201cI know just the thing to ask for! I\u2019ve been thinking about this since last Christmas, and I\u2019ve finally come up with the best idea EVER! A Money Printer! Just imagine all the money I could make for FREE! I\u2019ll be RICH! I could save Santa all the trouble of catering to my 25-page wishlist and just buy my OWN presents! I am officially a genius,\u201d Lizzie remarked with a sly smile. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Santa\u2019s final stop of the day was the teachers\u2019 lounge, where Mr. Adler and Mrs. Eaton were taking their midday break in between classes. Adler, licking the Rotisserie Chicken-flavoured candy cane that Santa had given him earlier, explained that his greatest wish this holiday season was \u201cone of those glasses and mustache disguise kits.\u201d Adler hinted at his elaborate plan to prank his Earth Science classes. \u201cThey\u2019ll never know it\u2019s me,\u201d he said, refusing to reveal any more details about his project, whispering that his students might be listening in on our interview, out to \u201cthwart his mission.\u201d Eaton asked for something even stranger than all the rest: a carrot. When asked what she would use the vegetable for, she explained, \u201cWell, actually, I was just hungry. This is my lunch break.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Santa, on his last straw after hearing of all the aforementioned requests, decided that it might just be better to skip this holiday season altogether, opting to spend it instead on a peaceful, remote island in the Bahamas with his wife, leaving parents everywhere to fend for themselves.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
On December 1, Santa (who, according to many sources, looked a little too suspiciously like Mr. Gasparini in a faux beard) was spotted infiltrating classes to get the inside scoop on what our students and teachers most desire. The results may surprise you. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":52,"featured_media":13058,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13057"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/52"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13057"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13057\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13058"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13057"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13057"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jdrampage.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13057"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}